Summer, as usual, has not been good to MittenGirl. This year, I have been good and I have been bad about regular blogging. Mostly bad. I hope that I could get back to good with some uplifting life changes and some honest discipline. Starting Tuesday.
I promise myself to post more frequently. I really do. I need the outlet. I hope to kind of pull myself out of the quicksand and do the things I know I want to do, which are:
- write more often (blog and book),
- be my sweetheart’s best friend again (I’ve been on such a roller coaster of moods),
- get back to both school and my hobbies (get that degree, do my yoga and/or swimming).
You know, like a real life! This is not too much to ask of myself! It sounds pretty good. I’ve just got to start. And that’s the hard part. I’m bad at that.
Still, this halfway existence is no place to linger for very long. And I’ve just been wallowing in the muck. I always complain that nothing ever changes (not that I do anything about that anyway, but I still complain), and now, they have, despite all my objections.
My family moves this weekend. Tomorrow evening, after a goodbye-NJ-pizza and a bathtub’s-worth of tears, they’ll be making the 1,000+ mile trip, with my parental units to follow just as soon as they possibly can. To a lot of people, this isn’t such a big deal. I know many people who just don’t see their family very often, regardless of distance. When my young, independent self chattered on about moving cross-country after completing her education, my mother told me that “this kind of family doesn’t do that, we stick around close to home, living in the pockets of those we know, and visiting every Sunday”. Then they proceeded to do it to me. Twice. First, they all moved an hour and some minutes away from our hometown (where I still live, I kept my end of the bargain), and now the first half are moving to the place of oranges, hot weather, and Mickey Mouse, with the elders soon to follow. We don’t want to live there. I can’t stand being hot. Hey, Ohana means family!!!!! I’m being left behind, but we don’t want to follow!
The other big change is that I am rejoining the ranks of employed, responsible adults and going back to my old company (yay!) for a one-year assignment (yay!), but in a different department and capacity (not-so-yay!) on the day after Labor Day. I will be celebrating and being thankful for the day on Monday, but it’s my last day off for a while (goodbye, half-empty roads and stores… goodbye, awake at 3 a.m.!). Unlike most people trudging to work Tuesday morning bleary-eyed and unhappy about finishing what was left undone before the big weekend, I’ll be skipping around campus (and it is a campus!), happy to be back.
I got quite a bit done here these six months. I’ve also been doing a lot of helping with the craziness of moving those peeps, a lot of errands, and a lot of lazing on the couch; looking at different spots on the ceiling and memorizing the sounds of the movements of my neighborhood on a random afternoon. However, to look at the house, you’d wonder if I did anything at all. It’s still insanely packed. Just much less so than before. With no comparison, it looks pretty bad. With comparison, it looks pretty damn good. The only true solution is to move up, get our lives together and get either a bigger place or a house, hopefully. That’s my focus, along with the “reality” mentioned in the introduction to this letter.
I’ll keep you posted, those of you still checking my blog, and much more frequently.